Monday, April 8, 2013

Boot Camp kicked my butt

Before I even started writing this post, I told Colin I was going to write an entry about DD boot camp and how it all went.  His response?

"You can't write that much, you have another spanking coming at 8."

Boot camp is over, yet I still have another spanking to deal with.  And a severe one at that.  Pray for my butt, ok?

The reason I still have the severe spanking is because last night when it was supposed to happen he started getting really bad pains in his shoulder.  Just so happens the hand he spanks with, has a bit of a shoulder issue.  He's had it for years now, but thankfully we've recently been to a doctor about it for xrays - next stop is an mri, so hopefully they'll be able to fix him up.  After all, that arm is more important to us than they think. :p

Anyway, he was going to still do it, but I asked him to please put it off until tonight.  Not for my sake (although I certainly wasn't complaining,) but more for his sake.  I knew he wanted to go through with it because he's been so good about being dominant and stepping up to the plate, but I didn't want him to hurt his shoulder even more.  I told him that I understood completely and wouldn't be let down, so thankfully he agreed and we moved the last spanking of boot camp to tonight.  Just so happens it was the severe one, and now i'm wishing we had just gotten it over with yesterday!

Boot camp (for us) consisted of two days.  Four spankings a day, and four assignments a day.  I won't bore you guys with every single detail, but i'll give ya a little outline of how it generally went.

Saturday, the first day of boot camp, he woke me up semi early and said we were going to start, so for me to get into position for the first spanking of the day.  Let's just say, it didn't start off so smoothly.

I still struggle with the thought of, "why do I want this?"  There are times when I worry that he thinks it's stupid and childish, and it messes with my head.  I'm getting a lot better when it comes to realizing he doesn't think that way at all and that he not only doesn't feel that way, but that he WANTS to spank me.  This is where the problem came about - after the first spanking, he told me to go to the corner.  We haven't really used that one before, and it somehow reallllyyy messed with my head.

I just started getting over thinking spanking was silly, now he's telling me to go to the corner?  Great.  It's not that I don't think it would be effective, and it's not that I don't want him to use that consequence, but I just got that feeling in my head again.  "This is silly."  "Why do I want this?  Am I stupid for wanting this?  Does he think i'm stupid for wanting this?"  Instead of talking to him about it, I went back to how I was in the beginning.  I flipped out.  Told him to just leave me alone and let me have some space.

We were able to talk about it, and I explained it to him and asked him if we could skip that part of the boot camp.  We came up with compromise, which was that we wouldn't use it during the boot camp spankings, but if it was deserved throughout the day, he expected me to listen.  I thought that was fair.  That way, during the spankings for boot camp, I could focus on what I was supposed to be focusing on, rather than worrying about being told to go to the corner.

*Turns out I must just be an angel, because he didn't even have to use the corner at all. :)*

So getting back to the schedule.  This will probably be semi long, and maybe a little bit confusing, but if you're interested in doing the boot camp at all, it could be a good thing to read.

Sat morn - first spanking & first assignment.  The spanking was the "hard spanking," which consisted of 20 spanks with the hairbrush as a warm up, a break for a minute-ish, 25 with the paddle, another minute or two break, another 20 with the paddle, another minute or two break, and then another 20 with the paddle.

Talk about a spanking to set the tone for the day, huh?  OUCH!

Some implements we used.
After the spanking we did the first assignment, which was making a list of rules.  We already had rules, so we went over them, and ended up adding two new ones.

Saturday afternoon - second spanking & assignment.  This spanking was the "medium one," which was exactly like the hard, but without the last 20.  (Getting confused yet? We sure did .. but it actually is pretty easy to go along with once you get the schedule down pat.)  The second assignment was to discuss why we want a dd marriage, and the pros and cons.  Pretty good assignment, and we had a good conversation about it.

Saturday early evening - third spanking & assignment.  This spanking sucked.  Big time.  It's the "severe spanking."  This spanking was exactly like the hard one, but add on 20 with the strap at the end.  I never thought i'd be the type to get to tears that easily, but this spanking got me there at around the halfway done point.  It HURT!  The assignment we did third was to write out 5 positive qualities about yourself, and what it brings to your relationship.

Saturday night - before bed we did the fourth spanking & assignment.  This spanking was the "mild spanking."  This was just the 20 with the hairbrush.  Yes, it was a lot less compared to the other three, BUT I was already so sore, so it certainly wasn't a walk in the park.  The last assignment we did was just discuss what we thought about the boot camp at the end of day one, and if there was anything we needed to work on.

We came up with two things.  He needed to work on asserting his dominance throughout the whole day, rather than just when he was spanking me.  I needed to work on listening.  Here are the results of the first day:
Our second day was a lot like the first, just with a couple different assignments.  I think we only did two assignments because we had to do some family things, but the assignments we did were, 5 positive qualities about each other, and bringing up something from our past.  We weren't sure if it was supposed to be silly or serious, so we ended up talking about some funny incidents from our past.  The assignments were really nice, and I actually enjoyed them.  Another thing we changed, was that instead of using the paddle we switched to the wooden spoon at times, and the bathbrush at others.

Another thing to mention is that each spanking had it's own "lesson."

Mild spanking - No complaining.
Medium - No kicking feet up/screaming/asking to stop.
Hard - Holding still/no reaching hands back.
Severe - It could always be worse.

He was pretty strict about all those things throughout all the spankings, but concentrated more on each one during the time it was supposed to be worked on.  Another thing he did, more so the second day, was be pretty insistent that I use Sir a lot.  He usually doesn't make it a point that I say that, and i'm really glad he did.  I might be hesitant at times, but truth is I actually *Like* saying it.

Found at

Another little side note here - we've been trying to come up with subtle little ways to show his dominance, and we haven't come up with much.  There's the whole "Sir," thing, we've talked about using kneeling, which I find very submissive but we haven't tried it yet, and that's about it.  So if anyone has any ideas or suggestions, we'd both really appreciate hearing from you. :)  Either here, or you can email us at

So bottom line for boot camp?  I really liked it.  It HURTS .. more than I thought it would, and the damn spankings were hard to take, but I think it was really good for us.

I just asked his thoughts and he said:

"In the beginning, it was a big learning process, but once I got the hang of it, it was really good for us.  It brought us even closer, and i'd strongly recommend anyone who's thought of it, to give it a try.  Beginners and even people who have been doing it for years."

Ha, sounds like he'd be getting paid to promote it.  He's not, I promise. :)  We're both very happy with how it went.  Now if only I could get out of this last severe spanking.  Let's try it out since he's sitting right next to me on the couch.  He's watching hockey, so maybe with him being preoccupied it could work?

I looked at him, and went to open my mouth to ask him if we could skip it, and literally before any words came out, he looks at me and says ..

"Ready?" And points to the bedroom.  I tried to tell him I was still writing, but that didn't work.  Ahhh wish me luck, i'll be back to finish this post in a little bit.  Probably lying on my stomach..

"Let's go!"  Oh geez, hush already, i'm coming! :p
Grr.  Colin is a pain!  So the second severe spanking is done finally, but he thought it'd be a good idea to make me finish writing the blog while lying on my stomach, with my pants down.  As he's sitting there watching his hockey game!  And I thought this guy wasn't dominant?  Yea, right!

So thankfully i'm pretty much at the end of the entry, because i'm ready for my pants to be up, and for his comments while im lying here to stop.

"How's your butt feel?"

Obviously, it doesn't feel great right now!
Oh will you hush, im trying to write here and you are distracting me! :p  Pay attention to your hockey game rather than me ... please?

As he was just doing the severe spanking, I noticed I could see our shadows on the wall, and I could tell when he was about to start the spanking, so I had to look away!  It did make for a pretty cool picture though.  When I took the picture, he reminded me that I had to post a few of the spanking pictures here.  Again, I ask myself .. why did I think he wasn't dominant?  I'll add most more towards the top of the post, so by the time you're reading down here, you'll have already seen most.  Buuut, here's the shadow one.  I don't know why I found it to be a good photo op - guess I just thought it was a fun picture.


  1. I love all the pics you posted!
    But seriously, thank you for sharing this. DH has been talking about wanting to try it, if we had the chance of course, kids....But I understand the feeling of silliness. I felt like that for at least the first half year, but once I understood him better about ttwd, I never felt it again. I always feel more self aware at those times too.

    1. Aw thanks Julia! :) He's evil with making me post the pictures, but it certainly does add to the lesson in a way. If you guys get the chance to try it, I say go for it .. I only have good things to say about it! :)

  2. holy.craziness.batman! I think I am a major wimp because I don't think I could EVER go through that much of a spanking! Girl! I am so glad it went well for you guys. Your post has taught me "it could always be worse!" LOL Your thoughts and feelings in the beginning of the post are so familiar to me. I often wonder "are we crazy? Am I crazy?" I have only been sent to the corner once, but I was thinking "seriously?!?! Is this for real?!? The thoughts are tough...but the emotions afterwards and knowing it works makes it worth it. Thanks for sharing!

    1. lol the beginning of your comment made me laugh. :) Doesn't that "Am I crazy?" feeling suck? And yea, the corner thing is tough! The emotions afterwards and knowing it works totally makes it worth it though, you're right. Thanks. :)

  3. I'm so glad you survived bootcamp! It sounded like a long and painful but really beneficial weekend for you guys. Doesn't cornertime suck? I'm normally told to go to the corner to wait before he punishes me.

    Just remember you're not crazy or silly. You're normal, or as normal as the tons of other people in the same lifestyle getting their butts spanked. Just enjoy the ride.

    <3 Lily

    1. Ugh cornertime DOES suck! He had me do it the other night for the first time. Well the first time that i've actually been able to listen and just do it. It was only two minutes, and it felt like ten!

      Thanks for the comment, it's nice to be reminded that there are plenty of other people who feel the same way! :)

  4. Wow, bootcamp sounds intense! I can see how that would open up communication lines and help you both realize what you want. Sounds like it was a great experience for you guys :) May I suggest an ice pack? ;) The shadow picture is so cool! Thanks for sharing!

    1. It was intense for sure! I wish I had thought of an ice pack then! Damn, lol... i'll have to keep it in mind for next time. :)

      Thanks for the comment, and i'm glad you liked the picture! :)

  5. Kenzie,

    Congratulations to the two of you for completing the boot camp. And, especially to you for taking so many hard spankings.

    Sometimes, I have thought that this is silly, adults spanking each other. But, as Lily said, it is normal and it has so many positive benefits for people who are in this life style.

    Thank you for sharing the details.


    1. Aw thanks Joey! You're right, it has so many positive benefits, and in the end I think that will be totally worth it! :)

  6. "You can't write that much, you have another spanking coming at 8."

    That quote made me smile, that is such a menacing thing to say! It sounds like overall it was really great (though not easy!) but so glad to hear it was good learning -- that's always the best. It sounds like he's really stepping it up and also that he cares a ton.

    Loved your shadow picture too, it is so dramatic and artsy.

    1. Lol he can be very menacing when he wants to be! Overall it was a good learning experience for us both. Thanks for the comment and the compliment!

      Glad to see you back here! :)

  7. I just found your blog tonight, as me and my husband are new to DD, but your feelings are sooo close to mine. It's nice to read something that reflects what I experience as well! Glad I stumbled on your blog...I'll be reading on here for sure. Thanks for sharing your intense experience!

    1. Aw yay, thanks for the comment. it's so nice to find people who have the same sort of feelings about ttwd/dd - i've come to find there are a lot of link minded people here. I'm headed over to check out your blog now. :)

  8. This was really interesting to read. I don't frequent all the DD blogs so am not very familiar with the boot camp process. It sounds like you two both liked it (well, sort of ;) and I hope things continue to go well with learning your dynamic.

    1. Thanks for reading Lea! Yea I didn't find that much information on it throughout the blogs, so I figured it could be a helpful post to someone one day? I'm glad you stopped by. :)

  9. I am new to DD and my HOH and I are going to have our first sit down and writing of rules this weekend. We are in a long distance relationship and exstreamly committed to this journey however my HOH thinks we should start with a full blown boot camp. I have reservations about this tact I am not sure if this is a good idea since we have just begun. But he insists and I now wonder if this is a platform (in his mind)to beat me into submission which is NOT my understanding of this journey. We both have read the Boot Camp book and I don't know if I feel this out of fear and anxiety of the boot camp process or is it really just too much to soon? any thoughts?

    1. Hey there, thanks for the comment and for asking for advice. Anyway, I don't mean for this to be judgmental at all, so please don't take it that way - but in my opinion, the point is NOT for him to beat you into submission. This is about two adults consenting to do ttwd/dd/ds whichever label you'd like to use. If you feel the boot camp is too much to begin with (i've actually read advice from people saying not to use it if youre a real beginner) then go with your gut. Respectfully explain to him that you're not ready for that step yet. I also read they're coming out with a beginners boot camp, so maybe look that up if you're interested. Discussing everything, agreeing to it all, and communicating is really important .. good luck, and feel free to ask me any other questions! :)

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  11. Oh dear Jesus. I do not think I could do this Kenzie!!!! It makes my stomach ache just looking at your bottom in those pictures!!! I'm so sorry but I guess I'm glad you liked it. Boy howdy, your poor behind. Good for you! You're tough! I've not had a punishment spanking yet because I do not like breaking rules. Lol I'm a wimp! I'm sure it will happen eventually and when it does I do not want that series your poor bottom had!!!! Thank for this post. It was excellent.