The Dom With The Palm.

Sooo I'm kinda sorta supposed to be doing some chores right now, but I'm kinda sorta bored of the chores and wanted to write something fun.

Colin texted me this morning and told me to check our app to see what he added for today. I answered with, "Yes, Sir." He then said:

"Good girl. Let's start this week off right and you will be rewarded, but the minute you act up or not do something I tell you to do, you will be punished. Do you understand me?"

Geez. Mr. HOH is back! I checked the list and decided I'd get most of it done later on in the day. I went to the store, got stuff for dinner, because I'm now obsessed with our crockpot! I love having dinner ready for him when he gets home, it makes me so happy to do that for him. So anyway,  I did that and then decided to watch a bit of tv. I got pretty into my show and ended up watching a few more episodes than I should have.

My phone went off and I saw a text from Colin.

"I don't see anything checked off the list. You don't want to disappoint me baby."

I quickly got up, checked the list, and was able to do a few things and cross them off. It was too late in the day to do two of them, and there are two others I haven't done yet. I just realllllyyy don't feel like vacuuming or doing laundry right now. I mean he never reallllyy told me I had to get them all done, so I'm hoping what I did do will suffice? Wishful thinking, I know. Having said that, I really should be vacuuming, but blogging just sounds like so much more fun right now!

Soooo - I haven't done any Dr. Seuss lately and I figured now is as good of a time as ever. So, rather than "The Cat in the Hat," here is:

The Dom With The Palm!

The sun did not shine,
I had no time to play,
I had chores to get done,
On this cold winters day.

The tv was calling,
I sat down for a few.
And I said, hmm hold on,
Didn't I have something to do?

Too tired for chores,
Should I be making a call?
I'll just sit on the couch,
and do nothing at all.

So all I did,
was sit sit sit sit.
Oh no, he will not like this.
Not one little bit.

And then
something went BUMP!
How that bump made me jump!

I looked!
Then I saw him, I couldn't respond!
I looked,
and I saw him.
The Dom with the palm.
Standing there staring,
looking a bit like king kong.

I know you were tired,
and not feeling well.
But your chores are not done?
No, I will not yell.

I know a few games we could play,
said the Dom.
I have a few tricks, 
Said the Dom with the palm.
A lot of good tricks,
I will show them to you.
Your bottom will not mind 
not at all if I do.

And poor little me,
did not know what to say.
I shouldn't have sat on the couch
all damn day.

So a voice said, no no!
Make that Dom go away!
Tell that Dom with the palm,
you do NOT want to play!
He should not be here.
He should not be about.
He should not be here
while your bottom is out!

Now, now - have no fear!
Have no fear, said the Dom.
My tricks aren't that bad,
Said the Dom with the palm.
Why, we can have
lots of fun if you wish.
fun with a game, that I call,
swish swish.

Oh no! Not swish swish!
I know that sound.
No way, not swish swish!
I don't want my pants down!

Have no fear said the Dom.
I will take them down fast!
panties down too,
no not at half mast!
With a brush in one hand,
you just stay calm,
We'll handle this now,
Shhh said the Dom.

Look at you.
Look at you now,
Said the Dom
your bottom all red,
from the sting of my palm.
I will go grab a belt,
you better obey,
now it's off to the corner,
red bottom on display.

Then he came to the corner,
Said, my what a view,
next time pick your chores,
or a cane of bamboo.

And in that moment,
I did not know what to say,
Should I tell him, yes Sir?
Be good and obey?

Next time do my chores?
What should I do?
Well what would YOU do,
if your Dom asked you?

This story ended up being wayyyy longer than I thought it was, so I left out some parts in the middle to make it a bit shorter.

My Dom with the TWITCHY palm is on his way home now, and I just told him that most of the chores were done, but not all of them.

After hearing a mini lecture from him, and receiving a text that says, "I don't want any hesitation. When I say get over my knee, DO IT,"I'm wondering if this poem will resemble real life at all when he gets home tonight .. eeek.

I sweetly replied to that text with a, "Yes Sir." This followed:

"I'll see you when I get home."
"I love you lots and lots and lots!"
"That's not going to help that bottom of yours."

Wish me luck!

You can say that again!