You had questions, I have answers! :)

Ok.. so I didn't exactly reach my goal and get back to blogging by Friday, buuuut it is Monday, so I'm glad I was able to get back here today. :)

I started a 30 day diet this past Wednesday, and I'm so excited! It was tough at first, still is tough from time to time, but the results make it SO worth it! 9 lbs so far! Yay! Basically two meals are shakes (which taste like cake by the way) and then you have a 600 calorie dinner with healthy foods. You have to drink a ton of water, and there are some little snack things a couple times throughout the day to make it easier.

I'm also going to start getting to the gym this week, so hopefully the results will end up even better!

The best part is that Colin is going to do it with me!!! It will make it so much easier for both of us to be doing it together. Plus we have some little incentives for each other to make it more fun.

Other than that, DD is going okay. We still have the ups and downs, but it's better than it was before. He's been great so far helping me stick to the diet, now I just need to see a little more sterness/less leniency. ;)

Aside from that, not much else is new. Thought I'd take the time to answer some questions I got on the last post. Rather than answering individual comments, I'll just answer them here.

DelFonte asked:

Where we are with DD/TTWD and if we're planning any exciting holidays.

I somewhat answered the DD question above, but we're doing pretty good. We have some work to do, and life is certainly still getting in the way, but I'd say we're in a good spot right now. As for holidays, nothing too soon unfortunately, but hopefully a fun get together in the summer with some DD friends! I need a vacation asap.. somewhere warm!!

Blondie asked:

Do we see a time (or age) when the DD is not necessary, and/or the spankings end?

I say... no way, lol. We'll be one hundred years old and he'll still be carrying a wooden spoon in his back pocket. ;) I think (and hope) it will always be a part of our marriage. We're fine without it, but I just think we're so much better with it.

Colin said: I haven't thought about it much. I can't see the spankings ever ending, and I always think DD will be there. There may be ups and downs, or it might slow down, but I don't see it ever going away permanently. More challenges will come up as we get older, kids, etc, but it'll still be there.

Julia asked:

What I thought of the 50 Shades movie.

Honestly, I was pleasantly surprised and can say I enjoyed it. There were parts that pissed me off, and the main actress annoyed the crap out of me for the most part, but the actor who played Christian was wayyy hotter than I thought he was before the movie. It was fun to go see something different, that somewhat shows (even though it's in a skewed messed up way) spanking, and a D/s kind of thing. It annoys me that they pretty much say Christian is the way he is because of a messed up childhood, but all in all.. it was good entertainment and I'm excited for the second one!

Leigh asked:

When is life going to get back to normal so I can visit more often?

Lol, hopefully SOON! ASAP! Work is slowing down, but other things are picking up, so it'll be a tough balance, but I think I'll have more time to come visit than I have lately! :)

SheandHim asked:

What is one place I'd love to shop if money wasn't an object? And, what is my favorite kind of implement for play?

The shopping question is not fair.. I can't pick one place!! Lol, Colin will tell you I'm a ridiculous shopper. I especially love makeup and clothes, so if money wasn't an object I'd so crazy at either Sephora or Urban outfitters!

As for the implement.. I love the belt. There's just something really sexy about it!

Roz asked:

What direction would I like to see my dynamic take, and who is someone I admire and why?

I'd love for ttwd to be present more often. When it comes to little things such as deciding where we eat, or what movie we're going to see. I guess I'd really like for him to have more of a say in every day things. I guess just more Dominance from him, and more submission from me to sum it up. :)

As for who I admire? My parents. I'm so lucky to have such amazing, supportive, loving parents. Honestly, I can't even put into words what they mean to me. Also, Colin. He works so hard, is so supportive, loyal, caring, and just an amazing man who I have so much respect for.

Thanks everyone for the questions! There's still a little bit time left in March, so if anyone has any other questions for either of us, feel free to ask. :)

Back just in time for question month! :)

Hi everyone!

Like the past ten(ish) blog entries of mine have said ... it's been a while!!

I'm so over crazy work schedules and ready to have some days off and time to devote to blog land!

Things seem like they're starting to slow down a bit, so hopefully (fingers crossed) I'll be able to write more, and visit other blogs more as well!

I miss everyone!!!

Anyway, I'll keep it short for now and hopefully on Friday will have time for a better update.. but I want to spend some time on others blogs right now so I can catch up!

BUUUUT before I go - I see it's question month .. soooo Colin and I will both be happy to answer any and all questions!

Make them as juicy as you'd like, or throw some vanilla ones in there as well.

As long as there's nothing that gives away personal info, we'll answer them all. :)

Reconnection Spankings & A Fresh Start

Ahhh I've seriously missed this blog! Work and life has just been crazy and unfortunately I haven't had any time to keep up with it. :(

Besides writing in my own blog, I really miss reading how everyone else is doing! I can't wait to catch up over the next couple of days.

Colin and I hit a bit of a rough patch with DD over the past 6 months or so, and I honestly didn't know how (or if at all) we were going to be able to get back into things. Our relationship was still great, but we both knew it was lacking something.

I sort of just accepted the fact that with work going the way it was, and Colin working around 60-80 hours a week it had to take a bit of a back seat. I trusted that eventually we would get back to where we needed to be, but as more time passed, I started to lose hope a little bit. I knew Colin wanted DD, and it wasn't lacking because of interest... but there was just nothing we could really do about it.

Soooo, we sort of let it go for a bit, but then finally decided to sit and talk about it and figure out how to get back on track. He expressed his concerns, I expressed mine, and it really helped us start fresh.

His main thing was that he was over thinking everythingggg. Would the spanking be enough if he got home at 10pm and it was only a 5 minute long thing? Would he live up to the Hoh I needed him to be? Would he be able to be consistent enough? Would I be understanding if things still got in the way from time to time?

For me, it was more about.. will I be able to be submissive after so long? Will I be able to let him take the lead? Will I trust him to take our relationship where it needed to be? Would I be able to be understanding if things did still get in the way, and not get annoyed when it happened?

Basically there were a lot of questions going through our minds that made it difficult to step back into our roles. Once we talked about those things, and were able to be completely open and honest with each other, we were able to figure it out together.

Another thing that helped immensely was that we were lucky enough to have a weekend get together with some old DD friends, while meeting some new ones as well! I honestly can not put into words, how thankful I am to have these people in our lives. They are all SO understanding, helpful, sweet, and most of all genuine. I loveeee when we're all able to get together, and can't wait until the next time! :)

Something that helped us a lot, was that during that weekend, we all discussed some DD questions and were able to listen to different responses, different thoughts, and different perspectives. Honestly, that moment was probably the biggest eye opener for both of us when it comes to our DD relationship. 

Once we got home, Colin decided we needed some role affirmation/maintenance. Starting last night, we'll be having 3 nights worth of spankings. Last night was a great start..other than the fact that I forgot how much that damn paddle hurts!!! I feel like such a weight has been lifted from my shoulders, and I feel closer to Colin than ever. I don't want to jinx it, and I know real life can and WILL get in the way - but I think we'll be able to handle it a lot better from here on out.

He's also mentioned wanting to come up with some assignments/daily activities to keep me feeling submissive. Has anyone else done anything like that? What are some things your hoh has had you do, that helped you feel submissive day to day?

It is seriously a resolution of mine to make more time for this blog, so hopefully I'll be writing again soon. Can't wait to catch up on everyone else's blogs and see how everyone has been. Everyone having a good 2015? Hope it hasn't looked like this picture yet. ;)

You! Yes you .. come out from hiding! LOL Day 9

Yay! It's once again time for LOL day. This year is the 9th year blogland has had LOL day, and I'm so excited to be part of it for my 2nd year!

A big thanks to Bonnie and Hermione for this fun tradition!

So, what is LOL day? It's a chance for all you lurkers to come out from the shadows! I'm so thankful to have people who read my blog, comment, email me, etc - but I know from blog stats that the biggest percentage of readers are silent.

I was a lurker before I started blogging, so I know how it is! Maybe you don't think you have anything to say? Maybe you don't think you're experienced enough? Maybe you don't know what to say? None of that matters! It especially doesn't matter today.

Today (and tomorrow as well!) is a day for YOU! Start typing in that comment box! Ask me a question, tell me something about yourself, or just say hi! This is such a friendly community and an awesome place to talk with like minded people. I've been lucky enough to meet some great friends here, both online and even in real life! Sooo now is not the time to be shy! It's your time to speak up.

You can comment as anonymous, you can make up an email account and use that, or if you'd rather it be in private, you could shoot me an email at ddcouple26@gmail.com

I'd honestly love to hear from you guys so I thought I'd write up a couple questions just in case you're not too sure what to say! Pick one, pick a couple, pick all of them if you'd like. :)

1.) Are you in a DD relationship?
2.) What's your favorite tv show?
3.) If you could pick one implement to throw into a camp fire, which one would it be?
4.) Do you have a favorite joke? If so, share it.

Of course I love my non lurkers too, so I hope you'll comment and answer some questions as well!

Last year, Colin decided to add a little incentive to LOL day, and we decided we're going to do it again this year.

We have this thing called, "the naughty jar" which is a bunch of rolled up papers in a jar with different spanking assignments. Each piece of paper has a certain amount of spanks, a specified implement, and a certain position. There are even a couple "get out of spanking free" cards in there!

Depending on the number of comments, Colin will pick a certain number of papers from the jar, and carry out the spanking on me! 25 or less comments will be pants/panties UP, and more than 25 comments will mean panties down.. yikes!

1-10 comments = One paper
11-20 comments = Two papers
21-30 comments = Three papers.. etc, etc.

I know it can be scary to stop lurking and start joining in, but I promise you it's worth it...

Hopefully I'll hear from some of you today and tomorrow! :)

Expectations in a DD relationship

What do you expect from your Hoh in your DD relationship? What do you think they expect from you?

Colin and I had a fairly long talk the other night, and those are the questions that came up. What are the expectations? What do I need? What does he need? Are our expectations realistic?

When I first started DD, I half expected it to be like a story fairytale you read in a DD book. Where my HOH will say everything right, do everything right, discipline me every time I need it, and pretty much be able to read my mind. Right away he will know what pushes my buttons, what my triggers are, what words or phrases really get to me, what implements to use - I could go on forever.

Over time, I realized it's not very much like what you read in this books, but it IS possible to make it your own fairytale. A fairytale full of paddles and wooden spoons, rather than princesses and tiaras of course. ;)

We've had some serious ups and downs since we started this, I'm not the most naturally submissive sub, and Colin has some big time consistency issues, but I need to remind myself of how lucky I am. When I brought this all up to Colin, he was pretty much vanilla. Sure, he had a kinky side to him, but the whole DD thing was a brand new concept to him. He's been SO incredibly open to it, so willing to embrace it, and so eager to work at it. What more could I ask for? I know we hit a bit of a rough patch, but we're moving forward and making this whole DD fairytale our own.

He asked me to write up something with what I need/expect from him as my Hoh/Dominant, and what I think he needs from me as his Tih/Sub, so I figured I'd write it down in this post.

What I need from Colin:

• Consistency/Confidence - sticking to any punishments that you see fit, and following through with rules/consequences. Being confident in your role.
• Structure - A clear list of rules for me to follow.
• Less leniency - making a punishment a punishment. Not being easy on me all the time.
• Dominance outside of discipline - Make every day decisions. Of course discuss it with me, and ask for my opinions and thoughts - but have the final word be yours.
• Gentle Dominance - Cuddling, taking care of me, little things like playing with my hair, aftercare.
• Alternative punishments - When spanking can't be done, or even sometimes just in place of a spanking; corner time, writing assignments, early bedtime, whatever you see as fair.

What I think Colin needs from me:

• Respect - Respect your decisions, and just respect you in general.
• Obeying - Not arguing when you decide on a punishment. Getting over your knee, rather than putting up a fight. 
• Letting you finish a spanking - If you accidentaly spank me too low, or too high, talk to you after the punishment, rather than getting all pissed and arguing during it.
• Trusting you - Trust that you'll take the lead, and you will take care of things as you see fit.
• Communication - If I feel like you let something go or if I broke a rule - talk to you about it. Don't keep it in inside.
• Be more comfortable - Know that you love my body, and even if I have insecurities, remember that you love me and like what you see.

I'm sure these lists will change overtime, and maybe things will be added or taken away, but that's what I have for now. Hopefully typing it out will help both of us get to where we want to be.

As for a different topic, are you guys excited for LOL day?! I can't wait, and Colin and I decided we might be doing a giveaway of some sort, so all you lurkers, get ready to de-lurk! ;)

Hope everyone had a happy halloween! What'd you all dress up as? I'd love to hear all about your costumes!

Sometimes a Girl Just Needs to be Spanked!

I want to start off by saying thank you for the comments on the last post, and the words of encouragement. :) I really appreciate it!

That's one of the things I love about blogging. Other people get what you're writing about, they get how you're feeling, and they encourage you to keep on going. It's a nice place to be able to vent. (A little foreshadowing there.. beware of the venting.)

Anywayyy.. I have to say the DD flame is not exactly burning strong right now, but we're working on it. Colin has let some things slide, and I haven't exactly been too submissive lately, but it's getting a little bit better.

We're both SO busy that when I get home from practice at 8pm, or he gets home from work between 8 and 9, we just want to relax, eat dinner, watch tv, and play with the kitty! *The actual animal kitty guys - geeez get your minds out of the gutter. ;)*

We did have our talk after I wrote my last post. He came home with the list he wrote of things he wanted to talk about, and he seemed very serious and stern about all of it. It seemed like it would be a good start to things, and it was .. but it hasn't really gone much further than that.

Colin does manual labor all day, so when he gets home he's tired. I get that, I really do. I understand that sometimes he'd like to just relax, unwind, or even sometimes go to bed early, rather than having to deal with lecturing me, spanking me, etc. I understand that that's life and there will be those times.

BUT.. on the flip side, I think sometimes when you're trying to get something back up and running, you need to put that stuff aside and just do it. I mean, if I haven't been sticking to the rules, if I've had an attitude, if I've done something that deserves discipline, suck up your tiredness and just put me over your knee already!

Don't get me wrong, Colin is not the only part to the problem, and I'll admit that. I know people say Dominance comes from submission, and that makes sense, but I need his Dominance to bring out my submission.

I don't deliberately disobey, talk back, break rules, etc, but I also don't pay too much attention to them. For example, I know I'm supposed to drink a certain amount of water each day, or watch my cursing, or even just do things around the house when I'm home, but for the most part, I don't put in the effort.

Like I said, it's not deliberate. I don't do it to get a reaction from him, but I also tell myself that I most likely won't see a reaction from him. Sure, I might get a warning, or the threat of a spanking, but the follow through is not there.

I want to repeat that I understand he's tired, I understand he works LONG hours this time of the year and he gets stressed and exhausted. I'm not trying to complain about him at all. I'm really not. I guess I'm just trying to figure it all out.

Colin is the absolute best man I know. He's such an amazing husband, provider, friend, etc. He makes me feel completely loved, safe, protected, and happy. He literally makes me smile and laugh multiple times a day, and I would never change any of that. If we had to live without DD, our relationship would still be the best thing I could ever ask for in my whole entire life.

DD/Ds just adds to that greatness. It adds to the closeness, to the intimacy, to the love. It literally adds a whole other element to the marriage. Like I said, our relationship would be perfectly fine without it, but that doesn't mean I want to be without it.

I don't know what the answer is, or how to get back to how we both want things to be. It's not a question of whether or not he wants this. I know he wants this. Badly. When I really think about it, I can't say that DD isn't there. For example, I have the day off today and he told me a few things he wanted me to do while he was at work. One of those things was to clean a certain part of our couch that we tend to use as somewhat of a storage space. I just got a text from him saying, "How's the couch looking, young lady?" Or yesterday, I asked him to grab me something from the kitchen, and he gave me that look - right away I knew I forgot to add Sir to my sentence. So DD is still there. I guess what's missing is the follow through, and that's SO important to me. Like the picture I posted says, sometimes a girl just needs to be spanked! ;)

We'll get there, I know we will. It'll take time, patience, work, and probably a couple of arguments here and there. But it'll all be worth it.

On a happier note - he made a purchase the other day that we're both very excited to try out. It's something called Oh Mi Bod. Here's the link for anyone who wants to check it out.

OhMiBod

Hopefully we'll try it out sometime soon, and I'll be able to give a few more details next time I update. :)

One other thing I wanted to mention is that I have this messaging app called KIK, that I use to talk to some DD friends and it stopped working on my old phone. I just got a new phone, so I've re downloaded it and am now able to use it again - yay!

Love chatting to old, and new DD friends.. so If any of you have the app, or want to get it and say hi - feel free. You don't have to put in any personal info or anything, so it's nice and safe!

My name on there is kenziex0x0

Hopefully I'll talk to some of you there. :)

Reigniting the DD flame

How has it been over two months since my last entry in this blog?!

There have been so many times I've wanted to write an entry, but every time I went to do it, something came up. I finally decided I miss it so much, that I have to make time to get back into blogging.

Things have been pretty crazy since my last entry for both Colin and I. First thing to mention is we added a new addition to our family. Nooo, not a baby yet .. but a kitten! He's a little ball of energy, and can be such a little pain, but he is also so cuddly and sweet, and just so freakin' adorable! He was just jumping all over the keyboard, making it impossible to type, but now he's cuddled up next to me, sleeping, so I finally have the keyboard to myself!

Other thing keeping us busy is work. September through March or April is his busiest time for work, and I actually started working for the same company, so it's now busy for me as well. It's nice because it's not as much of a struggle money wise as it usually is for us, but at the same time, it makes DD/Ds pretty impossible.

To be completely honest, there has been very little, if any, DD type stuff going on with us. Unfortunately, it kind of faded into the background the last few months. It's weird, because part of me really misses it, but another part of me has been kind of relieved in a weird way.

There were times that DD/Ds felt like more work than it was supposed to be. I know it takes a lot of work to keep it going, and it's not always easy, but it just felt like .. too much. I think Colin might have felt the same way. I guess a bit of a break was a good thing for us.

That being said, I was wondering the other day if DD was .. done for us. We hadn't talked about it in a while, and I just didn't know where we stood with it.

I went on vacation with my family for a week, and Colin stayed home for work. Being away really really made me miss it. I no longer felt relieved, or wanted anymore of a break. I really wanted the DD/Ds aspect back in our relationship.

I sort of mentioned it to Colin while I was away, and when I came back he said we'd be having a long discussion about things. Part of me wanted to push the subject, and have the conversation then and just get things back on track, but I decided to leave it in his hands. He was aware of how I felt, and I wanted to see if he would follow through. I trusted him to take care of things.

So I've been patient, he's been insanely busy, but today he told me he made a list of things we need to talk about and we'd be having that conversation tonight, as long as he gets home at a decent hour.

I'm happy that he wants things back on track as well. I think life got in the way, and neither of us really pushed to keep things going - but in the end, I think it was a good thing. I think we'll get back to how we were, and end up being even better than ever in our DD/Ds relationship. We'll find what works for us, and make this lifestyle our own. :)

Has anyone else gone through anything like this before? Where DD or Ds just kind of faded away. No one did anything to mess it up, or to end it, but it just sort of stopped for a while? Were you able to start it back up again?

It's always been hard for me to just let go, and let him take the lead. Usually I end up trying to make things go my way. How I envision it going. This time, I'm letting go. I'm trusting him to be the HOH and to get us where we need to be. I'm anxious, and excited, to see what happens. :)

I'm also going to try my hardest to get back into regular blogging. I really miss reading everyones blogs and seeing how everyone is doing. Going to catch up on that right now!

I also saw that it's almost LoL day!!! Yay! I'm happy that I came back to blogland in time for that. I can't wait. :) All you lurkers out there, get ready with some questions or comments - I'll try to think of something to make it fun!